I don't claim to be an avid film watcher, but here's my top...several...films of 2013, some with comments, some bolded as ultimate faves:
Gravity - most innovative use of 3D to date
Prisoners - watched this today, dark, brooding and morose
The Imposter (documentary) - creepy and highly intriguing
The Place Beyond the Pines
The Conjuring
Insidious: Chapter 2 - shock scare after shock scare. Wan does it well.
Silver Linings Playbook - I didn't rate Jennifer Lawrence before this movie, but she's got chops.
Only God Forgives - different!
Iron Man Three - this was way more entertaining than its bitter franchise rival
Star Trek: Into Darkness
Elysium
Side Effects
Evil Dead - one of the most violent films I've ever seen.
Furious 6 - not bad. Since Paul Walker's death, this franchise might either die after its recent entertaining resurgence or push through.
Upstream Colour - PAY ATTENTION in this film. So awesome, unique.
Oblivion - Cruise is a wanker. Can act.
Hangover III - this got a very bad wrap, but I enjoyed its different style.
This is the End
The World's End
-----------------------------------------------------------------
SHIT MOVIES:
Now You See Me - So bad. So, so bad. What were these actors THINKING!?
A Good Day to Die Hard - this is just sad. Should have stopped after DH3.
Europa Report - yawn.
ahhh that'll do.
Yeah, gatsby ain't on there because I didn't watch it. American Hustle, WoWS and The Hobbit II aren't on there because they ain't out yet. Relax, guy.
They'll probably all win Oscars anyway so what are you worried about?
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
Sunday, August 30, 2009
#14
It's certainly been a while, friends.
I still make it out to be August - just. I thought I'd squeeze in a quick howdy-doody before the month ends. This will be the first blog post ever I have not really rehearsed or thought about in too much depth beforehand. That's right, I usually think before I write.
Not this time!
The last 2 months or so have been unbelievable. You know of Rock Werchter already - if you don't simply refer to blog #13. After that, my family basically descended on me from all angles to visit.
It was truly awesome and somewhat surreal having them around. They stayed in the house I have lived in for the past 6 months, they made their breakfast, showered, got in my way...just when I'd forgotten the little nuances of living at home, it all came flooding back.
Was it good? Yes and no.
Yes because I remember the fondness I have of home and living in a comfortable environment with friends, family, work - whatever. No because I in some ways had moved on slightly from that. Essentially this year I have moved out of home at the tender age of 18. I only really started to think of it that way when I inevitably moved back in with my folks, or rather, they moved in with me.
Go figure.
After a wild time with them, I set out on a 28-day gallivant around Europe with my brother and 2 good friends of both of us. You can quote me on saying that it's probably the best thing I've ever done. The experiences, memories and general insanity that occurred on that trip - I will never forget.
It is interesting though, on a trip with 50-odd people, the same 50-odd people (interchanged about halfway through with 5 leaving and 6 newies coming on board) how the group dynamic develops, grows and shifts rapidly.
For instance, from the get-go in Calais, certain areas of the bus and people preferences as to where and who they sat with were defined. Of course this did change all the time as 'no one owned a seat', but a certain pattern could be seen all around the bus - myself included. The whole group was mostly amicable with each other throughout the whole trip, however (I can sense your salivation), frustrations to tend to manifest themselves amongst the group after about 4 or 5 days.
They either grow and fester like a nasty disease or parasite, or they go away and first, second, even third impressions falter and we're left asking 'Why did I think like that towards that person?'
Many comparisons have been made to a 'Big Brother' type of environment in terms of you're somewhat 'stuck' with this people for an extended period. Just like on that ridiculous show, the gossip mill goes mad. Everyone is guilty of it. Everyone. I believe it's a facet of human nature - to talk about others, often in a condescending or judgemental way. It would be impossible not to - after all, what else is there to talk about? Is it insecurity? Probably. Who knows? In my own experience, there's a certain satisfaction about hearing the latest gossip from someone, it's just something to talk about I suppose. The sniping that goes on is awesome when you take a step back and just observe - remembering of course that you yourself are guilty of the crime you're observing...
Think about it.
One of my ways of dealing with it was amusement. My outlook was 'I've paid a buttload (or fucktonne - a useful phrase I learnt from the British on tour) of money for this trip, it's not going to last forever, this insane fun, so ha! Hahahah! And that helped - a lot. That allowed me to have even more fun and continue to be myself around these people.
You often hear people vow that they'll stay in touch and miss people etc etc. Of course this happens, I'm not saying it doesn't - heck I miss people right now, and I am keeping in touch with them. For now. Who knows who I or who they will be talking to in 6 months, a year from now? Eventually the need or want to stay in touch will fade...fade away. Either that or it will become stronger. That is when you know you've found a true friend from a host of strangers.
Innit funny 'ow the ol' world works, govna?
Until next time...
I still make it out to be August - just. I thought I'd squeeze in a quick howdy-doody before the month ends. This will be the first blog post ever I have not really rehearsed or thought about in too much depth beforehand. That's right, I usually think before I write.
Not this time!
The last 2 months or so have been unbelievable. You know of Rock Werchter already - if you don't simply refer to blog #13. After that, my family basically descended on me from all angles to visit.
It was truly awesome and somewhat surreal having them around. They stayed in the house I have lived in for the past 6 months, they made their breakfast, showered, got in my way...just when I'd forgotten the little nuances of living at home, it all came flooding back.
Was it good? Yes and no.
Yes because I remember the fondness I have of home and living in a comfortable environment with friends, family, work - whatever. No because I in some ways had moved on slightly from that. Essentially this year I have moved out of home at the tender age of 18. I only really started to think of it that way when I inevitably moved back in with my folks, or rather, they moved in with me.
Go figure.
After a wild time with them, I set out on a 28-day gallivant around Europe with my brother and 2 good friends of both of us. You can quote me on saying that it's probably the best thing I've ever done. The experiences, memories and general insanity that occurred on that trip - I will never forget.
It is interesting though, on a trip with 50-odd people, the same 50-odd people (interchanged about halfway through with 5 leaving and 6 newies coming on board) how the group dynamic develops, grows and shifts rapidly.
For instance, from the get-go in Calais, certain areas of the bus and people preferences as to where and who they sat with were defined. Of course this did change all the time as 'no one owned a seat', but a certain pattern could be seen all around the bus - myself included. The whole group was mostly amicable with each other throughout the whole trip, however (I can sense your salivation), frustrations to tend to manifest themselves amongst the group after about 4 or 5 days.
They either grow and fester like a nasty disease or parasite, or they go away and first, second, even third impressions falter and we're left asking 'Why did I think like that towards that person?'
Many comparisons have been made to a 'Big Brother' type of environment in terms of you're somewhat 'stuck' with this people for an extended period. Just like on that ridiculous show, the gossip mill goes mad. Everyone is guilty of it. Everyone. I believe it's a facet of human nature - to talk about others, often in a condescending or judgemental way. It would be impossible not to - after all, what else is there to talk about? Is it insecurity? Probably. Who knows? In my own experience, there's a certain satisfaction about hearing the latest gossip from someone, it's just something to talk about I suppose. The sniping that goes on is awesome when you take a step back and just observe - remembering of course that you yourself are guilty of the crime you're observing...
Think about it.
One of my ways of dealing with it was amusement. My outlook was 'I've paid a buttload (or fucktonne - a useful phrase I learnt from the British on tour) of money for this trip, it's not going to last forever, this insane fun, so ha! Hahahah! And that helped - a lot. That allowed me to have even more fun and continue to be myself around these people.
You often hear people vow that they'll stay in touch and miss people etc etc. Of course this happens, I'm not saying it doesn't - heck I miss people right now, and I am keeping in touch with them. For now. Who knows who I or who they will be talking to in 6 months, a year from now? Eventually the need or want to stay in touch will fade...fade away. Either that or it will become stronger. That is when you know you've found a true friend from a host of strangers.
Innit funny 'ow the ol' world works, govna?
Until next time...
Thursday, July 9, 2009
#13
13 Blogs. Sounds like the title for a crap Hollywood movie.
If you look to the right hand side of this page, you'll see the blogs sorted into months - you'll notice that June had one blog post. ONE. Am I getting lazy? Probably. Does it matter? No, shut up.
SO. Rock Werchter
That's the latest and greatest thing that's happened to me. One of my favourite festival line-ups and experiences of all time. This is a lineup which we will probably never see in Australia in the near future, unfortunately - perhaps in a hundred years or so - when all of these bands are dead and gone.
Do these bands all sit around at dinner time? Drink wine and muse about current affairs? That, would surely be an interesting dinner party.
Let the review begin.
MILD DRUG REFERENCES
That's right - by no means as hardcore as Download. For instance, I saw no breasts, not one. Not even the male genitalia. It was a completely different crowd, Belgians, Dutch and Australians mostly. So you know what that means - weed. Weed, Weed, Weed. It was everywhere - I couldn't believe the amount going around, completely unnoticed or, more accurately, unchallenged by anyone. Gotta love the Dutch.
Also, this time the 'talent' was of a much more respectable standard - none of your oppressed, rebellious 'I-need-to-wear-a-nose-ring-and-look-like-a-bull-and-have-bright-pink-dreadlocks-to-be-different-and-noticed' folk here. Just your ordinary looking people.
Rock Wechter is world renowned for its class and organisation - in fact, it has won 'Best Festival in the World' 4 times - 3 of those in a row from 2005. I came in to the festival expecting a lot - after Download, which I was overall quite impressed with. Unfortunately, I was slightly disappointed not too far into the whole ordeal.
*GASP*
I have one letter for you. Q.
Queues everywhere - too long, ridiculous. The deal is you get your ticket zapped by a zapper-dealy for a wristband - allowing for a speedy entry later on in the festival. That's a good idea. What's a bad idea is having one place to do it for 80,000 people. Download had a nifty little wristband which was initially adjustable, then locked into place in about 3 seconds. They also had them at campsites and various other places to ease congestion. Werchter had a similar system, but with a metal clamp used to lock your wristband on. The whole process took about 20-30 seconds per person. Times that by 80,000 - and you get a figure somewhere in the vicinity of too freaking long in the freaking line! We thought we had it bad, waiting nearly an hour in 30 degree+ heat. Two of our fellow festival-goers waited for double that.
A shame.
And just when I thought we'd be rid of queues forever - the drinks voucher queue was shoved into my existence. But I'm in too much of a good mood right now to talk to you about queues. What a stupid word, 'queue' it could have 4 less letters and mean the same thing.
NOW - the bands. Naturally, with two stages, we couldn't see EVERYONE - but we did ok.
THURSDAY
Eagles of Death Metal - couldn't tell ya, heard 'Really Wanna Be in LA' and 'Boy's Bad News' or whatever, from a distance - they sounded fine.
Lily Allen - I'd seen her before at BDO 2007 - she was great then, she was great now. Played a lot of new material which is good I might add - and funny as ever. Quite good looking too in the heat!
Dave Matthews Band - These guys are fantastic live. I highly skilled bunch of musos playing their hearts out. I love the drummer as well as the violin player who looks like a cousin of Bob Marley. Dave Matthews himself is a superb live singer - their version of 'All Along the Watchtower/Stairway to Heaven' was magic
Placebo - Now, I don't really know Placebo a great deal. They don't REALLY float my boat. 'Special K' is all right, but Brian Molko's voice is just annoying. He's also weird looking - androgynous and all that. But you knew that already.
Pendulum - Saw them at Download. They were much better there, only because we couldn't get into the tent to save our lives. Packed.
Oasis - You can just see the tension between the Gallagher brothers. Noel and Liam. Liam and Noel. Hahah - will they ever stop bickering?! Anyways, they were good - we were about to fall over with fatigue though, we heard about half of their set and bailed. They played '...Morning Glory' as we left and we could hear 'Wonderwall' from the campsite. All good.
The Prodigy - Obviously, we didn't hear them. Once again, couldn't see them due to circumstances out of our control. Bollocks.
FRIDAY
Amy MacDonald - A kind Scottish lass with no real qualms with anything. Music was ok, pretty low-key.
M.Ward - This guy is cool. I don't quite know how to pigeon-hole him and his band. It's kind of like blues, but not. He does a mad cover of 'Rollover Beethoven' by everyone. Check him out.
The Streets - Always good fun. Notable highlight was when Skinner took off his shirt (let me finish) and asked for another one from the crowd - 10-20 were immediately thrown at him, he tried one on and took it off, claiming it was too small. Madman.
Elbow - Only saw the end, sounded ok - very harmless music.
Bloc Party - Great fun, great interaction with the crowd. I often said, YOUR Mercury is in retrograde. Take that, dude from Bloc Party.
The Killers - In a word, fantastic. They were simply amazing - one of the highlights thus far. They played a good mix of old, middle and new. Brandon Flowers' voice was tremendous.
Coldplay - Just when you think your nights been topped, here come Coldplay. They played a staggering 26 songs, remixes included. Chris Martin did a 'Werchter Song' - seemingly improvised. They did a Michael Jackson tribute, paid homage to their co-headliners The Killers, and basically blew everyone away.
SATURDAY
Rodrigo y Gabriella - The classical guitar duo who do a rad cover of Metallica. What more could you want. Their flamenco style is outta this world.
Regina Spektor - She was good, we really couldn't hear her that well though. She's odd too - wacking a wooden chair with a drumstick. I did fall asleep at one point too...
The Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Regina's weird? Karen Oh is weirder. She deep-throats the microphone, damnit. Good entertainment though.
Mogwai - These Scottish instrumentalists were fantastic, so much so that we missed Franz Ferdinand for them. They are LOUD and awesome - wall of sounds kind of vibe. Apparently, FF told them to keep it down for their set, as they are known for being one of the loudest live bands going around.
Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - No matter what you think of Nick Cave's music - he's an impressive dude. He's energetic, fun and engaging. And he's Australian. 'Stagger Lee' was a favourite of mine. Upon reading a sign in the crowd 'CAN I HAVE YOUR GUITAR?' Nick said, 'No, you can't have my fucking guitar'. Gold.
Kings of Leon - These guys exceeded my expectations. They're not great showmen, but Caleb Followill can sure sing. Consistently as well. His voice has much improved over the past few albums, they're as tight as hell and catchy too.
SUNDAY
Metro Station - I'm kidding, I only heard 'Shake It' from far away!
The Mars Volta - From what we saw, they were great. Unfortunately, while watching them, we nearly drowned in the epic downpour, so we missed a great portion of their set running back to the campsite to check on our things.
Black Eyed Peas - Very good actually! I was shakin' my humps do these dudes. Will I Am did a cool tribute to MJ as well.
Kaiser Chiefs - These guys were tiring, in a good way. The lead singer plays nothing but tambourine, so he was running around, climbing things and sweating like someone had turned a tap on from inside his body. His voice didn't suffer either. 'Ruby' went off like milk in the sun.
Nine Inch Nails - Trent Reznor and his latest NIN lineup were very impressive. Unfortunately, they didn't captivate the crowd as the majority were there for the next act. Some of you may know that NIN are calling it quits this year after over 20 years running. Check out this for a lineup/previous lineup list.
Metallica - A quality, quality performace. They captivated the crowd and were as rockin as ever. It was a bonus for us, as we had seen them in March - and this time they played about 7 or 8 different songs, some of which were specifically requested by us. They closed the festival in style with an insane pyro display and fireworks.
So that was Rock Werchter. 99% flippin brilliant. Goodness me it was hot too - 8am was far enough in the day to spend in a tent without suffocating inside. The cure for this was to continue sleeping outside in the sun like a reptile. Madness.
There's a lot of stuff I omitted here, there's just too much that happens at festivals to include in a semi-interesting blog post. And now to proof-read...all good (I think).
Shyeah.
If you look to the right hand side of this page, you'll see the blogs sorted into months - you'll notice that June had one blog post. ONE. Am I getting lazy? Probably. Does it matter? No, shut up.
SO. Rock Werchter
That's the latest and greatest thing that's happened to me. One of my favourite festival line-ups and experiences of all time. This is a lineup which we will probably never see in Australia in the near future, unfortunately - perhaps in a hundred years or so - when all of these bands are dead and gone.
Do these bands all sit around at dinner time? Drink wine and muse about current affairs? That, would surely be an interesting dinner party.
Let the review begin.
MILD DRUG REFERENCES
That's right - by no means as hardcore as Download. For instance, I saw no breasts, not one. Not even the male genitalia. It was a completely different crowd, Belgians, Dutch and Australians mostly. So you know what that means - weed. Weed, Weed, Weed. It was everywhere - I couldn't believe the amount going around, completely unnoticed or, more accurately, unchallenged by anyone. Gotta love the Dutch.
Also, this time the 'talent' was of a much more respectable standard - none of your oppressed, rebellious 'I-need-to-wear-a-nose-ring-and-look-like-a-bull-and-have-bright-pink-dreadlocks-to-be-different-and-noticed' folk here. Just your ordinary looking people.
Rock Wechter is world renowned for its class and organisation - in fact, it has won 'Best Festival in the World' 4 times - 3 of those in a row from 2005. I came in to the festival expecting a lot - after Download, which I was overall quite impressed with. Unfortunately, I was slightly disappointed not too far into the whole ordeal.
*GASP*
I have one letter for you. Q.
Queues everywhere - too long, ridiculous. The deal is you get your ticket zapped by a zapper-dealy for a wristband - allowing for a speedy entry later on in the festival. That's a good idea. What's a bad idea is having one place to do it for 80,000 people. Download had a nifty little wristband which was initially adjustable, then locked into place in about 3 seconds. They also had them at campsites and various other places to ease congestion. Werchter had a similar system, but with a metal clamp used to lock your wristband on. The whole process took about 20-30 seconds per person. Times that by 80,000 - and you get a figure somewhere in the vicinity of too freaking long in the freaking line! We thought we had it bad, waiting nearly an hour in 30 degree+ heat. Two of our fellow festival-goers waited for double that.
A shame.
And just when I thought we'd be rid of queues forever - the drinks voucher queue was shoved into my existence. But I'm in too much of a good mood right now to talk to you about queues. What a stupid word, 'queue' it could have 4 less letters and mean the same thing.
NOW - the bands. Naturally, with two stages, we couldn't see EVERYONE - but we did ok.
THURSDAY
Eagles of Death Metal - couldn't tell ya, heard 'Really Wanna Be in LA' and 'Boy's Bad News' or whatever, from a distance - they sounded fine.
Lily Allen - I'd seen her before at BDO 2007 - she was great then, she was great now. Played a lot of new material which is good I might add - and funny as ever. Quite good looking too in the heat!
Dave Matthews Band - These guys are fantastic live. I highly skilled bunch of musos playing their hearts out. I love the drummer as well as the violin player who looks like a cousin of Bob Marley. Dave Matthews himself is a superb live singer - their version of 'All Along the Watchtower/Stairway to Heaven' was magic
Placebo - Now, I don't really know Placebo a great deal. They don't REALLY float my boat. 'Special K' is all right, but Brian Molko's voice is just annoying. He's also weird looking - androgynous and all that. But you knew that already.
Pendulum - Saw them at Download. They were much better there, only because we couldn't get into the tent to save our lives. Packed.
Oasis - You can just see the tension between the Gallagher brothers. Noel and Liam. Liam and Noel. Hahah - will they ever stop bickering?! Anyways, they were good - we were about to fall over with fatigue though, we heard about half of their set and bailed. They played '...Morning Glory' as we left and we could hear 'Wonderwall' from the campsite. All good.
The Prodigy - Obviously, we didn't hear them. Once again, couldn't see them due to circumstances out of our control. Bollocks.
FRIDAY
Amy MacDonald - A kind Scottish lass with no real qualms with anything. Music was ok, pretty low-key.
M.Ward - This guy is cool. I don't quite know how to pigeon-hole him and his band. It's kind of like blues, but not. He does a mad cover of 'Rollover Beethoven' by everyone. Check him out.
The Streets - Always good fun. Notable highlight was when Skinner took off his shirt (let me finish) and asked for another one from the crowd - 10-20 were immediately thrown at him, he tried one on and took it off, claiming it was too small. Madman.
Elbow - Only saw the end, sounded ok - very harmless music.
Bloc Party - Great fun, great interaction with the crowd. I often said, YOUR Mercury is in retrograde. Take that, dude from Bloc Party.
The Killers - In a word, fantastic. They were simply amazing - one of the highlights thus far. They played a good mix of old, middle and new. Brandon Flowers' voice was tremendous.
Coldplay - Just when you think your nights been topped, here come Coldplay. They played a staggering 26 songs, remixes included. Chris Martin did a 'Werchter Song' - seemingly improvised. They did a Michael Jackson tribute, paid homage to their co-headliners The Killers, and basically blew everyone away.
SATURDAY
Rodrigo y Gabriella - The classical guitar duo who do a rad cover of Metallica. What more could you want. Their flamenco style is outta this world.
Regina Spektor - She was good, we really couldn't hear her that well though. She's odd too - wacking a wooden chair with a drumstick. I did fall asleep at one point too...
The Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Regina's weird? Karen Oh is weirder. She deep-throats the microphone, damnit. Good entertainment though.
Mogwai - These Scottish instrumentalists were fantastic, so much so that we missed Franz Ferdinand for them. They are LOUD and awesome - wall of sounds kind of vibe. Apparently, FF told them to keep it down for their set, as they are known for being one of the loudest live bands going around.
Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - No matter what you think of Nick Cave's music - he's an impressive dude. He's energetic, fun and engaging. And he's Australian. 'Stagger Lee' was a favourite of mine. Upon reading a sign in the crowd 'CAN I HAVE YOUR GUITAR?' Nick said, 'No, you can't have my fucking guitar'. Gold.
Kings of Leon - These guys exceeded my expectations. They're not great showmen, but Caleb Followill can sure sing. Consistently as well. His voice has much improved over the past few albums, they're as tight as hell and catchy too.
SUNDAY
Metro Station - I'm kidding, I only heard 'Shake It' from far away!
The Mars Volta - From what we saw, they were great. Unfortunately, while watching them, we nearly drowned in the epic downpour, so we missed a great portion of their set running back to the campsite to check on our things.
Black Eyed Peas - Very good actually! I was shakin' my humps do these dudes. Will I Am did a cool tribute to MJ as well.
Kaiser Chiefs - These guys were tiring, in a good way. The lead singer plays nothing but tambourine, so he was running around, climbing things and sweating like someone had turned a tap on from inside his body. His voice didn't suffer either. 'Ruby' went off like milk in the sun.
Nine Inch Nails - Trent Reznor and his latest NIN lineup were very impressive. Unfortunately, they didn't captivate the crowd as the majority were there for the next act. Some of you may know that NIN are calling it quits this year after over 20 years running. Check out this for a lineup/previous lineup list.
Metallica - A quality, quality performace. They captivated the crowd and were as rockin as ever. It was a bonus for us, as we had seen them in March - and this time they played about 7 or 8 different songs, some of which were specifically requested by us. They closed the festival in style with an insane pyro display and fireworks.
So that was Rock Werchter. 99% flippin brilliant. Goodness me it was hot too - 8am was far enough in the day to spend in a tent without suffocating inside. The cure for this was to continue sleeping outside in the sun like a reptile. Madness.
There's a lot of stuff I omitted here, there's just too much that happens at festivals to include in a semi-interesting blog post. And now to proof-read...all good (I think).
Shyeah.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
#12
THE DOWNLOAD FESTIVAL 2009 - A SPECIAL EDITION
PARENTAL WARNING - THIS BLOG CONTAINS WORDS ABOUT NUDITY AND OTHER CRAZY FESTIVAL GOINGS ON.
First of all, this blog will begin with lists and tallies.
What I Saw
Men's Genitals: 2
Women's Breasts: > 60
Drunk People: > 50,000
Men's Breasts: > 60
Beer Guts: > 5000
Clogged Toilets: > 100
Underage Guys Who Couldn't Hold Their Booze To Save Their Lives: 5
Tents on Fire: > 10
Explosions: > 5
Porta-Loos Severely Destroyed By Human Waste: > 50
People Passed Out, Prostrate On The Ground: > 10,000
You get the picture people. Insanity ensued last weekend.
What follows is a list of bands I saw and a brief, brief summary of what I thought of them:
FRIDAY 12TH July
Limp Bizkit: Saw them for about 10 minutes. They stunk.
Lacuna Coil: Solid band, quite tight.
Faith No More: A truly magnificent reunion. Brilliant performance - my top highlight. Mike 'The Human Synthesizer' Patton and the crew doing Poker Face and then Chinese Arithemetic.
We Care A Lot!
SATURDAY 13TH JUNE
Dragonforce: Highly entertaining, very impressive unit. Virtuosic Playing.
Pendulum: Another highlight for me. These guys were mind-blowing live. Aussies too! Propane Nightmares.
Prodigy: Unfortunately couldn't hear these guys as the area was so packed we couldn't get close. I heard though they rocked.
Marilyn Manson: Overall, a sub-par performance. He's getting old, tired and tubby.
Slipknot: Not my cup of tea really, but very impressive unit. Energetic and fun to head bang to.
SUNDAY 14TH JUNE
Journey: Awesome. Don't Stop Believin' baby!
Dream Theater: These guys were nuts, another set of virtuosos. Notable mention to the keytar/guitar/keyboard/synth duel. Holy crap.
ZZ Top: These old rockers rocked. Still got the wacky sense of humour and the slammin' rockabilly-blues vibe. I especially liked the fluffy guitars they brought out for one particular song.
Whitesnake: Truly Awesome. Although the only original member is the lead singer, they all slotted in very well. They played some great classic hits, said some funnies, blew everyone away. Here I Go Again
Def Leppard: Amazing performance. The band hadn't played there in 23 years - that show being the first major gig after the drummer, Rick Allen lost his arm in a car accident. It was moving to hear a tribute from the lead singer about his drummer and friend and the amazing recovery that occurred. Notable mention to Rick Allen himself - who is an amazing drummer, minus a limb. His setup is truly awesome if you want to check it out here.
And now for some of the funny stuff. Honestly, there was too much to remember ALL of it - but here are some of the things that were humorous.
Upon arrival at the festival, the bus parked outside a solid 10-set of porta-loos. I had to go, so I opened the first door that was available and burst out laughing immediately. Let's just say that it was already not in a good way. Concurrently, Ben was approached by a 'nasal Englishman' who asked,
"Are you waiting for the bog?"
Ben replied in his most Australian of accents,
"Yeah nah, go for it"
Apparently, he looked blankly at him and proceeded to the nearest bog.
What's next...ah yes! Our introduction to Download - Limp Bizkit. It became abundantly clear that there were some haters out there. How do I know this? Well, lead...singer...I guess... Fred Durst came out and did his trademark whine 'Wassup Download!?'. A man walking away from the stage, clearly already disgusted and annoyed simply shouted, very loudly,
"FUCK OFF!!" and kept walking.
Brilliant!
Later on, a man we saw a few times over the weekend was only wearing underpants. We never saw him wearing any other clothes than a pair of black undies the whole time!
Anywho, there was a couple making out on the ground, and he got his bits out. Yes, those bits. He was proud of it too. What happened next was hilariously horrifying - close your eyes if you don't want to know. You know you wanna. I thought so.
He started to pee, in front of everyone. And then, the edged his stream close to this couple having a moment. My view was obstructed, but I'm quite sure he got a few spots on them. Of course, he got his hands wet in the process, and started congratulating the couple with pats on the back and head. Disgusting.
EVEN LATER, during Faith No More, one of the ladies in front of them started vomiting uncontrollably. They ran out of tissues, Ben felt it his duty to help them out - handing them a packet of tissues to help her out. Good on ya Ben.
That's about it for the moment, if I think of anything more entertaining to write I'll put it up. If not, I won't!
Rock on!
Sunday, May 31, 2009
#11
THE FA CUP FINAL - WEMBLEY STADIUM SATURDAY 30TH MAY 2009
As you may already know, I got to work at Wembley Stadium for the FA Cup Final yesterday. I've worked at Wembley a few times previous to this, but as you'd imagine - this event is a tad more special.
Upon arrival, I was allocated the area known as The Great Hall. It should be noted that the various rooms and restaurants at Wembley morph and merge into a number of different manifestations. This week, The Great Hall was 'The FA Club' - the hangout for all of the major sponsors of the FA and their guests, as well as some British celebrities. Some sponsors include: Carlsberg, McDonalds and National Express. All booze was on the enormous tab of the FA. ALL BOOZE.
I snagged the bar as my place of work - pretty easy, handing out free bottles of Carlsberg to all these folks, topping up the Carlsberg urns - basically a table with a tub in it - filled with ice and hooch. This urn was to be constantly full with no less than 12 brews at all times, there were 5 of these urns - all of them close to the bar, which basically had an unlimited amount of booze. No doubt that the patrons were grateful of the FA's generosity.
SO - the day's events...
Near one of the two giant TV screens where they were showing how the two teams got in the Final (Chelsea and Everton you troglodyte - get with it), Everton supporters cheered as the ever-important goal was replayed in front of them. I was walking past with another waiter, who must have been in his 40s, and had a chalk stain of a hand print on his back and his shoulder. Someone got him good. I think he found the cheer to be a little bit too loud as he says to me,
"Bloody hell, life eh?"
I raised my head in half-hearted acknowledgement. What the hell does that mean? 'Life eh?'. You poor thing, you're waiting in the most prestigious room on arguably the biggest day on the British football calendar. Yeah life really sucks. From then on, I decided not to tell him that he had white hand print on his shirt. I was going to, honest.
As the day wound up later, tiredness set in amongst everyone - staff and managers alike. See the way it works, you have a general restaurant manager and then people below him such as bar manager, back-of-house managers and managers designated to areas of the room. I have deduced though, that technically these people are all on the same level on the hierarchy ladder - as many managers swap around rolls. Anywho, they started biting off each others' heads quite blatantly. Concurrently, the people back-of-house whose job it was to put away dirty and clean glasses into their designated areas, decided that life was all too hard.
'Where are you getting those glasses from?' I was asked.
'The bar'
'Can you stop bringing them please?
'Why?'
'Don't you want to go home today? This is taking ages...'
'I'm just doing what I'm told' which is all one can really do when getting paid minimum wage. And who cares, you clown - you get paid for the hours extra you work. Go ahead, I dare you to approach a disgruntled manager and demand that you go home. Good luck, you pillock.
Later on, as I was signing out I overheard (eavesdropped, sure) a conversation explaining that a worker leaned over a bar, took an ice cube out of a bucket and put it in his mouth - all in front of a customer waiting for service. He got kicked out. Nice one!
Yep.
Oh yeah, the actual FA Cup was in the room for a while, the percussionist from the band kept nodding and smiling at me as if to say 'You know what's goin' on mun' (he was Jamaican) and I served a dude from Eastenders tea. I found out that last one much later as I'm not familiar with British soap operas as much these days.
Pip, pip.
As you may already know, I got to work at Wembley Stadium for the FA Cup Final yesterday. I've worked at Wembley a few times previous to this, but as you'd imagine - this event is a tad more special.
Upon arrival, I was allocated the area known as The Great Hall. It should be noted that the various rooms and restaurants at Wembley morph and merge into a number of different manifestations. This week, The Great Hall was 'The FA Club' - the hangout for all of the major sponsors of the FA and their guests, as well as some British celebrities. Some sponsors include: Carlsberg, McDonalds and National Express. All booze was on the enormous tab of the FA. ALL BOOZE.
I snagged the bar as my place of work - pretty easy, handing out free bottles of Carlsberg to all these folks, topping up the Carlsberg urns - basically a table with a tub in it - filled with ice and hooch. This urn was to be constantly full with no less than 12 brews at all times, there were 5 of these urns - all of them close to the bar, which basically had an unlimited amount of booze. No doubt that the patrons were grateful of the FA's generosity.
SO - the day's events...
Near one of the two giant TV screens where they were showing how the two teams got in the Final (Chelsea and Everton you troglodyte - get with it), Everton supporters cheered as the ever-important goal was replayed in front of them. I was walking past with another waiter, who must have been in his 40s, and had a chalk stain of a hand print on his back and his shoulder. Someone got him good. I think he found the cheer to be a little bit too loud as he says to me,
"Bloody hell, life eh?"
I raised my head in half-hearted acknowledgement. What the hell does that mean? 'Life eh?'. You poor thing, you're waiting in the most prestigious room on arguably the biggest day on the British football calendar. Yeah life really sucks. From then on, I decided not to tell him that he had white hand print on his shirt. I was going to, honest.
As the day wound up later, tiredness set in amongst everyone - staff and managers alike. See the way it works, you have a general restaurant manager and then people below him such as bar manager, back-of-house managers and managers designated to areas of the room. I have deduced though, that technically these people are all on the same level on the hierarchy ladder - as many managers swap around rolls. Anywho, they started biting off each others' heads quite blatantly. Concurrently, the people back-of-house whose job it was to put away dirty and clean glasses into their designated areas, decided that life was all too hard.
'Where are you getting those glasses from?' I was asked.
'The bar'
'Can you stop bringing them please?
'Why?'
'Don't you want to go home today? This is taking ages...'
'I'm just doing what I'm told' which is all one can really do when getting paid minimum wage. And who cares, you clown - you get paid for the hours extra you work. Go ahead, I dare you to approach a disgruntled manager and demand that you go home. Good luck, you pillock.
Later on, as I was signing out I overheard (eavesdropped, sure) a conversation explaining that a worker leaned over a bar, took an ice cube out of a bucket and put it in his mouth - all in front of a customer waiting for service. He got kicked out. Nice one!
Yep.
Oh yeah, the actual FA Cup was in the room for a while, the percussionist from the band kept nodding and smiling at me as if to say 'You know what's goin' on mun' (he was Jamaican) and I served a dude from Eastenders tea. I found out that last one much later as I'm not familiar with British soap operas as much these days.
Pip, pip.
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
#10
Double figures, baby.
Moving on...
Of late, I finally cracked the 'working-behind-a-bar' egg. (So now I can tell people that when they ask me!) My first proper experience being Friday night at Harlequins Rugby Club, down in Twickenham.
I was a tad apprehensive, only because I'd never really done it before. But our fellow staff and Bar Manager all seemed nice. We were split into 'teams' - which was basically areas along the bar. My team of 3 consisted of myself, a guy who spoke little English and a portly African girl with a loud voice and a brain whose reasoning centre was clearly non-existent.
Excellent. Fan-bloody-tastic.
Once the mob started arriving and then of course started drinking - problems started to arise. The African girl insisted that I stay on the tills while she took all the orders, gave me cash etc. This may sound efficient...it wasn't.
She was mad.
The tills we were working with had 3 operations, meaning one person could put an order in - then if someone else needed to use it, all they had to do was press a button, it would switch over to a new order - saving the previous one. Logical, easy and useful.
Madwoman did not understand this quantum leap in technology. I had given up her stupid method by this stage and was taking my own orders and pouring my own beers. She was in the middle of an order, but not at the till and I was ready to exchange a quick transaction. I switched over the operation and she freaked.
"No no no no no! What are you doing, that was my order!"
"Yeah I know, it saves it - it didn't go anywhere."
All the while she was arbitrarily stabbing the till and making it beep and boop - completely erasing hers and my order.
Moron.
Also, due to her portliness - it was difficult to manoeuvre with beers in your hand - especially when she was violently grabbing my arm telling me to get on the tills. Eventually she got to go home early, even though she was drinking wine and talking on her phone. GASP.
Why is all of this crazy crap happening to me! More to come I suppose.
Before I let you go back to your futile, meaningless lives I thought I'd tell you about a couple of strange British customs regarding beer.
Firstly, they like warm beer. Yeah I don't know either.
Secondly, a good portion of beer drinkers drink what's known as Shandies, also known as Lager Tops. What is this, you ask? Well it's mostly beer, topped off with a dash of lemonade! Now I thought this was solely for the ladies. I was wrong. The blokes like a hint of lame in their beers.
Admittedly, I haven't tasted it yet - it could be nice, but at the moment I'm abstaining on pure principal and spite.
Go make yourself a shandy, get back to me.
Moving on...
Of late, I finally cracked the 'working-behind-a-bar' egg. (So now I can tell people that when they ask me!) My first proper experience being Friday night at Harlequins Rugby Club, down in Twickenham.
I was a tad apprehensive, only because I'd never really done it before. But our fellow staff and Bar Manager all seemed nice. We were split into 'teams' - which was basically areas along the bar. My team of 3 consisted of myself, a guy who spoke little English and a portly African girl with a loud voice and a brain whose reasoning centre was clearly non-existent.
Excellent. Fan-bloody-tastic.
Once the mob started arriving and then of course started drinking - problems started to arise. The African girl insisted that I stay on the tills while she took all the orders, gave me cash etc. This may sound efficient...it wasn't.
She was mad.
The tills we were working with had 3 operations, meaning one person could put an order in - then if someone else needed to use it, all they had to do was press a button, it would switch over to a new order - saving the previous one. Logical, easy and useful.
Madwoman did not understand this quantum leap in technology. I had given up her stupid method by this stage and was taking my own orders and pouring my own beers. She was in the middle of an order, but not at the till and I was ready to exchange a quick transaction. I switched over the operation and she freaked.
"No no no no no! What are you doing, that was my order!"
"Yeah I know, it saves it - it didn't go anywhere."
All the while she was arbitrarily stabbing the till and making it beep and boop - completely erasing hers and my order.
Moron.
Also, due to her portliness - it was difficult to manoeuvre with beers in your hand - especially when she was violently grabbing my arm telling me to get on the tills. Eventually she got to go home early, even though she was drinking wine and talking on her phone. GASP.
Why is all of this crazy crap happening to me! More to come I suppose.
Before I let you go back to your futile, meaningless lives I thought I'd tell you about a couple of strange British customs regarding beer.
Firstly, they like warm beer. Yeah I don't know either.
Secondly, a good portion of beer drinkers drink what's known as Shandies, also known as Lager Tops. What is this, you ask? Well it's mostly beer, topped off with a dash of lemonade! Now I thought this was solely for the ladies. I was wrong. The blokes like a hint of lame in their beers.
Admittedly, I haven't tasted it yet - it could be nice, but at the moment I'm abstaining on pure principal and spite.
Go make yourself a shandy, get back to me.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
#9
The Cockney Accent. A wondrous hilarity I have had a fair bit of exposure to already, here in London.
While coming back from Royal Ascot on the train yesterday, we saw two men hop on. One carrying a garbage back full of knick-knacks, the other accompanied by a dog. They both smelled of a foul concoction of booze, weed and filth well beyond the realms one is normally accustomed to.
They did however, enter with a large amount of funny things to say - most of which I cannot repeat in their entirety, due to the fact it was completely impossible to decipher what they were saying. I did gather some sort of order and understanding.
The man with the dog immediately said,
"Look after this, innit godda piss!"
"Fuckin' 'urry up then, there i' is!"
It was immediately clear that these dudes were pretty much drifters, they didn't buy a ticket - a fact they decided to tell the whole cabin loudly.
The dog started sniffing a male passenger who obliged in patting him. The man, being overly unintelligible and loud, as well as highly racist, said,
"Look at the fuckin' dog, slobbering all over this pants"
Yes I said 'this pants'.
The man insisted it was ok, and they started 'chatting' I guess you could call it. The mate then came out of the toilet, refreshed I assume, started talking absolute rubbish. The initial bloke started airing his knowledge over brands of pants - Pierre Cardin, Giorgio Armani and Hugo Boss. Ironically, his jeans I saw later were Armani. Stolen perhaps...?
Toilet dude was shocked and apologetic that his dog was 'slobbering' over others. He then asked,
"Whadjoo fink 'is name is?"
His friend said, immediately,
"C**T. That's 'is name"
It was at this point, I burst out laughing. It is likely to be one of those 'had-to-be-there-moments'. Absolutely hilarious.
What followed this was an exchange of gibberish, followed by a kiss on the forehead from one to another, the toilet man tapping on the pole in Morse Code and his friend being aggitated by it. Unfortunately, these fine men had to leave at the next station. Just before this, however, one of them claimed that he was 'known' by CID. Unlucky.
I was sad to see them leave - the girl across from us asked,
"Did you understand anything they said?"
Not really, luv, but enough.
While coming back from Royal Ascot on the train yesterday, we saw two men hop on. One carrying a garbage back full of knick-knacks, the other accompanied by a dog. They both smelled of a foul concoction of booze, weed and filth well beyond the realms one is normally accustomed to.
They did however, enter with a large amount of funny things to say - most of which I cannot repeat in their entirety, due to the fact it was completely impossible to decipher what they were saying. I did gather some sort of order and understanding.
The man with the dog immediately said,
"Look after this, innit godda piss!"
"Fuckin' 'urry up then, there i' is!"
It was immediately clear that these dudes were pretty much drifters, they didn't buy a ticket - a fact they decided to tell the whole cabin loudly.
The dog started sniffing a male passenger who obliged in patting him. The man, being overly unintelligible and loud, as well as highly racist, said,
"Look at the fuckin' dog, slobbering all over this pants"
Yes I said 'this pants'.
The man insisted it was ok, and they started 'chatting' I guess you could call it. The mate then came out of the toilet, refreshed I assume, started talking absolute rubbish. The initial bloke started airing his knowledge over brands of pants - Pierre Cardin, Giorgio Armani and Hugo Boss. Ironically, his jeans I saw later were Armani. Stolen perhaps...?
Toilet dude was shocked and apologetic that his dog was 'slobbering' over others. He then asked,
"Whadjoo fink 'is name is?"
His friend said, immediately,
"C**T. That's 'is name"
It was at this point, I burst out laughing. It is likely to be one of those 'had-to-be-there-moments'. Absolutely hilarious.
What followed this was an exchange of gibberish, followed by a kiss on the forehead from one to another, the toilet man tapping on the pole in Morse Code and his friend being aggitated by it. Unfortunately, these fine men had to leave at the next station. Just before this, however, one of them claimed that he was 'known' by CID. Unlucky.
I was sad to see them leave - the girl across from us asked,
"Did you understand anything they said?"
Not really, luv, but enough.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
